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Dues paraules i un apòstrof

Dues paraules i un apòstrof (1º Premi de relat curt Donamésdona- Terrassa-2007)
La Míriam és filla única. Els seus pares es van divorciar quan ella tenia quatre anys. La mare no ha tornat a tenir parella fixa però el pare es va tornar a casar amb una dona deu anys més gran que ella, que tenia una nena adoptada en el seu primer matrimoni, i que ara viu amb ells. La Míriam no ho ha acabat d’encaixar mai tot plegat, encara que poques coses hi ha que li treguin la son. Ella viu amb la seva mare. Va estudiar filologia anglesa i ara és una traductora molt ben pagada. És intel·ligent i està convençuda que no té prejudicis. Va deixar de ser verge als dinou anys amb la persona ideal: un company d’idees molt clares, un amic amb qui poder compartir aquella experiència i també moltes altres inquietuds. Abans d’anar-se’n al llit ja havien parlat molt i un dia es van adonar que podien compartir, també, allò. S’estimaven com qualsevol parella d’amics però no es desitjaven ni estaven enamorats. Creien que enamorar-se només els duria problemes i no estaven per cabòries. La Míriam i en Roger es sentien equilibrats, sans, intel·ligents i moderns. Aquella experiència conjunta els va anar bé i no els creà traumes. Tant es trobaven per fer l’amor com per anar al cine o a menjar-se un gelat. Eren dos éssers pragmàtics.
En Roger és el petit d’una família nombrosa. Quan va explicar a casa seva que volia fer filologia anglesa, ningú no li ho va discutir. El seu pare gairebé s’havia mort del disgust quan el germà gran es va matricular a l’Institut del Teatre. La germana seguí la tradició familiar i estudià medicina. Els bessons se les arreglaven molt bé amb l’estudi de fotografia que havien muntat. Tots havien anat obrint camí, de manera que quan li va arribar a ell l’hora de decidir el seu futur, ningú no hi va trobar cap problema. Ell era el més petit, el menys controlat, aquell que fa tot el que vol i que, per esgotament natural i biològic dels pares, passa més desapercebut. Va voler estudiar filologia anglesa com podria haver volgut estudiar per capellà. Tenia una intel·ligència superior al normal –deien els mestres, des que era un marrec- però no la utilitzava, o no volia utilitzar-la, fet que a casa era del tot imperceptible. Portava bones notes, ja n’hi havia prou. En Roger era conscient de la seva intel·ligència superior perquè des de sempre ho havia sentit a dir, però saber-ho no l’afectava gens. Era tranquil i senzill i si no volia passar desapercebut s’hi havia d’esforçar. Quan els amics van començar a gallejar amb les noies, a ell no li sortia de dins i el prenien per un mestre tites però en Roger no s’immutava. Senzillament, no li agradava cap noia i no tenia ganes de perdre el temps. Quan va conèixer la Míriam, es van entendre de seguida. La noia era com ell, amb una única pretensió: guanyar-se la vida i no haver de dependre de ningú, per això havia estat la candidata perfecta per perdre la virginitat que a tots dos els feia nosa.
El dia que Heinz va arribar d’Alemanya i, a l’aula, s’assegué al costat d’ell, en Roger va experimentar un neguit desconegut que ja no va desaparèixer mai més. Va aconseguir endur-se’l a casa, on la seva presència quedava camuflada entre els altres germans. I encara més – digué, mentre l’intentava convèncer- tenint en compte que la germana havia anat a formar part d’una organització d’aquelles de metges del món o alguna cosa semblant. Només quedaven el gran, ell i els bessons, la presència d’un altre, per tant, ni es notava. Heinz caigué molt bé dins l’entorn familiar d’en Roger i quan un any més tard anunciaren que volien llogar un pis per anar-hi a viure junts, tothom ho va trobar el més natural del món. Els pares d’en Roger mai no van demanar explicacions. D’entrada, en Roger tampoc no els les va donar. Quan la seva relació es va consolidar, hi va haver una conversa a porta tancada amb els pares i els germans i tothom content. “Els de fora de casa no n’havien de fer res, de la vida d’en Roger”, va tenir molt clara la família en pes. La Míriam passà a ser un capítol tancat.
La Míriam no havia tingut mai cap pretendent. Tenia amics i amigues però amb la que més es feia, des que eren petites, era amb la Sara. Era la seva confident, tot i que la Míriam mai no va passar per episodis massa alterats, ni tan sols en l’adolescència. Malgrat aquesta característica inusual en una noia, la Sara sempre havia estat al seu costat, fins i tot quan li va confessar allò amb en Roger.
Quan li feien broma, “A veure quan ens sorprens amb un nòvio, nena!”. “Una noia maca, amb una carrera acabada, intel·ligent, que es guanya les garrofes, com pot ser que no tingui ningú que la rondi?” – encongia les espatlles i somreia amb cert posat de superioritat. La seva vida era ben seva i ningú no n’havia de fer res.
Però un dia va començar la inquietud pel fet de sentir-se una espècie de monstre dins una societat on tothom anava passant per l’adreçador. Va pensar en Roger. I si s’hi casava? Podria ser un matrimoni de conveniència, perquè era conscient que no se l’estimava i allò del matrimoni li sonava a música celestial, però la idea de casar-se amb en Roger no li marxava del cap, tot i que ara portava ben bé dos anys sense veure’l. Bé, si, s’havien vist en aquella festa de Cap d’Any, on ell li va presentar el seu company de pis, un tal Heinz, un alemany força ben plantat, però després – feia memòria- ja no l’havia vist més.
- El trucaré i li proposaré matrimoni- comentà amb la Sara.
- Però què dius, bèstia?
- Bèstia? Per què? Som amics des de fa molt temps, ens entenem la mar de bé, tot indica que funcionarà molt millor que altres que es pensen que...
- Però Míriam, tu no t’has adonat mai que en Roger és homosexual?
- Apa, què dius?
- No veus que Heinz i ell són parella? Digues-me, no te n’havies adonat?
- No.
- No pot ser!
- Són amics i viuen junts, comparteixen pis. No t’inventis coses que no saps. No siguis maliciosa.
- Maliciosa? A mi em sembla perfecte. Cadascú pot fer amb la seva vida el que vulgui. Em sembla perfecte, que siguin parella, ho sents? Perfecte!
La Míriam es sent ferida en la seva integritat. Ella que sempre ha pensat que és una dona moderna, no se’n sap avenir, de la seva pròpia reacció davant un fet que considera absolutament normal, encara que durant tants anys hagi suposat un anatema per a algunes ments educades en el tancament catòlic i que encara ho continuï suposant per a aquells que mai no han pensat que se’n podien alliberar.
- Si fos així com dius em semblaria molt bé.
- Llavors per què em dius maliciosa? Què té de maliciós, fer-te saber el que sé?
- És que no ho saps! Ells no t’ho han dit directament. I si no ho saps, podries estar difonent un fals testimoni, per molt que tu i jo siguem molt amigues i sàpigues que no ho diré.
- I per quins sets sous no ho hauries de dir? Què tindria, de dolent, que ho diguessis?
- Una cosa així no s’ha d’escampar - mentre ho diu ja es sent estúpida. Per què no s’hauria de poder escampar? però no afluixa - perquè és una cosa molt privada, perquè no ho sabem del cert, perquè podríem estar equivocades, perquè…- no té més arguments.
- Perquè tens uns prejudicis que no te’ls pots arribar a treure de sobre.
La Míriam sap que no pot argumentar res però l’orgull li impedeix donar la raó a la Sara, tot i que està convençuda que la té. Rosega un croissant i mira els ulls de l’amiga.
- Aquest croissant no val res- somriu.
- Si, d’això parlàvem!
- No t’enfadis. És sec com una pedra. - Aconseguiré que s’adoni que sé que té raó? No li ho puc dir directament. Ja veurà que dissimulo...
- Míriam, fes-me el favor de pensar en el què t’he dit. Però fes-ho amb la mentalitat oberta, sisplau. Ara marxo, que faig tard.
- D’acord…I tant, que hi pensaré!.- Se li acaben d’obrir els ulls, no solament a la
possibilitat abans no contemplada que en Roger sigui homosexual, sinó a un munt d’altres possibilitats envers la seva mateixa persona. Una llum s’acaba d’encendre al seu cervell, comença a veure-hi clar i alguna cosa li remou les entranyes.
La Sara marxa amb cara de circumstàncies i es dirigeix al metro. Instants després la Míriam es treu el mòbil de la bossa i comença a escriure un missatge. Només escriu dues paraules i un apòstrof, vuit caràcters - els ulls de la Sara no enganyen, com he pogut estar tan cega? La Sara arriba al metro i mentre baixa les escales, va traient-se el moneder de la bossa i en treu el bitllet. Se’l mira i pensa en la conversa. No s’adona de com l’estimo? Per damunt del cuir es sent el dring indicador de l’arribada d’un missatge curt. D’esma, torna a ficar la mà a la bossa i en treu el mòbil. Obre la tapa i llegeix. Només dues paraules i un apòstrof. Vuit caràcters:
T’estimo
El metro arriba just en aquest moment però la Sara se n’allunya i comença a córrer. Esbufegant, surt de l’estació i la veu allà, somrient, lluminosa. El bes, llarg i ple de contingut, canviarà les seves vides per sempre més.

Pseudònim: Ariadna Arles
(M.Montserrat Medalla)

13 de Juliol de 2007

87 comentaris:

Anònim ha dit...

Felicidades Montse, ayer estaba yo allí y te escuché como lo leías, me parece muy acertado el premio, es un relato encantador.
C.V.

Arare ha dit...

Gracias CV bienvenid@ a mi blog,espero que no sea tu última visita. Un beso.

barbollaire ha dit...

nina...
és tant i tant dolç...!
està tant ben escrit...!
és preciós de contingut i forma...!

no m'estranya gens que t'hagin donat el premi...!

gràcies per compartir-ho...

un petonet dolç... :¬)*

Glòria ha dit...

Un premi molt merescut!
Felicitats, Arare!

Arare ha dit...

M'alegra que t'hagi agradat, barbollaire, a mi també m'agrada, què hi farem? hehehe!
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Arare ha dit...

Gràcies, Glòria, una forta abraçada!!!

el paseante ha dit...

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uix, Paseante, si ja ho sé, tens raó... normalment en aquest bloc hi escric en blanc, però aquesta vegada em va fer gràcia allò de la bandera de l'arc de Sant Martí, però tens raó, ara mateix vaig a deixar-ho en blanc, és més "suau" per llegir i més fàcil pels miops com jo mateixa. Gràcies, company! Petons.

Déric ha dit...

Preciós! T'ho mereixes.
De totes maneres t'he de dir que es nota que està escrit des de fora d'aquest món, està fet amb perspectiva, mirant-s'ho de fora, però entenent-lo a la perfecció, no sé si m'explico, és igual, el conte és genial.

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Arare ha dit...

Deric, està tret de la vida real :D
si algun dia en tenim ocasió, ja en parlarem. Però si, evidentment, està fet "des de fora". Però un "fora" molt "dins"...

És el que vaig dir i sempre ho he dit: el dia que entenguem que tots som persones i que hi pot haver amor entre persones, independentment que siguin homes o dones, aquell dia haurem avançat força (bé, és la meva opinió)

Un petonet.

per cert... per llegir-los tots calia comprar el llibret, que valia un euro (preu simbòlic, és clar). Jo en tinc dos, el que em van regalar i un altre. Si vols envia'm les teves dades postals al meu email i te n'enviaré un, no em costa gens i així el tindràs. Els relats estan bé, els poemes... bé, tu mateix ho podràs jutjar.

Més petonets i a reveure.

Arare ha dit...

hola mib, reina mora guapísima. ¿Has hecho el esfuerzo de leerlo en catalán? Te admiro, mala mujé!!!

Me alegra que te haya gustado.

Todavía no lo he podido traducir y debería, pues tengo dos amigas que no pueden leer catalán y que me gustaría que lo leyeran... a ver si me pongo!!!

mil besos, preciosa

MoNaLiTzA ha dit...

M'hagués agradat que fos més llarg (suposo que hi havia un límit de folis) M'ho he passt molt bé llegint-te. Tens fusta d'escriptora. Felicitats, capitana! :)

Gulchenruz ha dit...

Gràcies per visitar el bloc, pots fer-ho sempre que vulguis, amb l'estat d'ànim que vulguis i dir-hi el què penses. Els 3 blocs que tinc hi són per escriure, jo, però si són comentats millor que millor.

Bonic conte!
una salutació des del Potemkin, l'Aleph i Divagarticles... els blocs.

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